What's a "Rainbow Baby?"

I'm a member of a local mommy-group that has a very active Facebook presence. When I found out I was expecting my second baby, I eagerly announced it to the group. They all knew that this wasn't my first pregnancy in the last year; it followed a loss by several months. At first, I was confused by the number of people telling me that they were expecting, or had, "rainbow babies" just like mine. What on Earth is a "rainbow baby" supposed to be, anyway?

Eventually, I got over my pride and embarrassment and asked what all this talk about "rainbow babies" was about. It turns out that "rainbow baby" is the preferred term in a lot of parenting groups (especially online communities) for a healthy pregnancy that follows a loss. The phrase refers metaphorically to a loss as a storm, and to the child that follows the loss as the rainbow. It's a band of hope after something tumultuous and traumatizing.

The precise definition of what constitutes a rainbow baby seems to vary a bit between cliques and groups. The moms I know consider a rainbow baby to be a baby that follows any form of pregnancy loss--including miscarriages, stillbirths, ectopic pregnancies, molar pregnancies, and abortions of pregnancies that are wanted but must be terminated for medical or other reasons. This acknowledges that pregnancy loss, and the trauma it entails, can take many forms. However, other groups (including online communities like BabyCenter) tend to use the phrase "rainbow baby" to refer only a babies that follow a "normal" miscarriage.

I have said since the beginning that I feel like the baby I'm currently growing is somehow the same baby I lost last spring. I don't know why I feel that way, but it seems to me like this isn't a sequel at all, but a continuation of the same story. I like the idea that the baby who is returning to me, now that the world is ready, is going to be my rainbow after the storm. I guess, trendy mommy-language aside, I'll have to add this phrase to my own lexicon.