When will my baby have a personality?

A baby's personality isn't instantly apparent before or after birth. Although some moms report that their kids' temperaments were set in stone the moment the cord was cut, others, like me, couldn't see our kids' personalities until later. If you're wondering when your baby will have his "real" personality, here are some factors to consider.

1. Newborns, in general, do not have true personalities. In strictly biological terms, newborns do not have personalities. They function based on reflexes alone, much like a developing fetus. This is precisely why some experts refer to the newborn stage as the fourth trimester. While newborns have temperaments, and some are more prone to certain behaviors than others, they do not display actual personality traits until later in their development.

2. Several external factors affect the temperament of newborn babies. During the first four months, babies still carry a flood of maternal hormones that can influence their behavior. Health-related factors like gas, colic, reflux, and feeding problems can also cause a baby to display behaviors, such as irritability, that may not be in line with his actual inherent personality. These factors tend to resolve after the first few months of the baby's life.

3. Preemies may take longer to develop personality traits. A premature baby may not display its true colors until later than its same-age peers. Personality is a milestone, much like walking or speaking, that comes on its own timetable for each child. Premature babies take longer to develop the neurological networks necessary for memory and personality, so expect your preemie to show notable personality traits later than their same-age peers.

4. Older babies can still experience dramatic personality changes.

Even after the newborn stage has passed and a baby has outgrown the influences that prevent the display of lasting personality traits, a baby's personality can change dramatically from month to month. A clingy 5-month-old can easily become a confident, independent 1-year-old, and vice versa. Personality develops over months and years, not days and weeks.

5. Your actions can (and will) influence your child's personality. You don't need a shrink to tell you that early childhood experiences help to shape a child's personality. While you can't change the way your baby is hard-wired, good parenting during infancy, toddlerhood and beyond will help to ensure that your child will be a confident, loving and kind-hearted individual. By being the best parent you can possibly be, you help to shape your child into the sort of individual who can maintain a positive outlook and a benevolent influence on the people around her.