My daughter, now 3 years old, had a few minor setbacks in the development of what experts call "self-care skills." The ability to dress and undress -- an important aspect of independence -- was one area that seemed to be lagging behind her peers. At about 30 months, I decided to check with an expert for an evaluation, due to this and other mild developmental delays. I mentioned to the occupational therapist the fact that my daughter couldn't undress or dress herself at all without help. I learned that my daughter's skills in this area were slightly behind average, but not severe enough to warrant ongoing occupational therapy.
If you're concerned about your toddler's inability to dress or undress herself, here are some facts that you may need to know.
1. Most babies start helping with dressing between 10 and 16 months. At some time around your toddler's first birthday, she'll start helping with dressing by putting her arm through a sleeve or attempting to tug a shirt over her head. Although it will be long time before she can put her clothes on all by herself, this is one milestone to watch for. It signals that your baby cognitively understands clothing and is beginning to develop the motor skills necessary to help with self-care.
2. Toddlers begin to help undress themselves between 22 and 30 months. On average, a toddler will be able to take off at least a few articles of clothing at around 24 months. A few toddlers might be able to undress themselves earlier, as soon as 18 months, while other healthy kids may not be able to undress until much later. Like all other milestones, undressing is something that kids may begin doing sooner or later than average, depending on their personalities and interests.
3. Most toddlers undress themselves completely at around 3 years. Despite my daughter's developmental lag at 2-and-a-half years, she was able to undress entirely at around her third birthday. This is approximately the average age at which kids begin undressing themselves completely, so it's clear that she outgrew the delay. On average, a toddler can undress himself entirely some time between 30 and 40 months of age.
4. Kids can generally dress themselves fully by age 4 or 5. Your toddler probably won't be able to fully dress himself at 1, 2, or 3 years of age, but he should be dressing himself entirely by his fourth or fifth birthday. This, of course, excludes difficult tasks like back-zippers, complicated snaps, and shoelaces. At 4 to 5, though, he should be able to put on his underwear, shirts, pants, socks and shoes with little difficulty.
5. Don't worry too much about delays. According to the occupational therapist who evaluated my daughter, a toddler's personality will play a tremendous role in her willingness to learn how to dress and undress. If your toddler is, like mine, perfectly content with being a "baby," she may not have much interest in learning the movements associated with self-care. But if your toddler has a self-driven, big-kid mentality, he's more likely to push forward and want to do things for himself.
6. Do address your concerns. If your toddler does seem to have delays in her self-care, be sure to have a professional take a look. If your toddler doesn't help with dressing by 16 months, partially undress herself by 30 months, undress alone by 3.5 years, or dress herself completely by 4 to 5 years, call her pediatrician. She may benefit from occupational therapy or physical therapy to enable the development of these critical skills. As always, defer to your pediatrician's judgment when it come to issues with your child's development.
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