When Should a Baby Use Pronouns?

In the early stages of language development, babies generally do not use pronouns at all. A one-year-old may refer to himself and others by name and completely omit words like "we," "our," "his," "her," "you," "me," and "yours." It is entirely normal for babies to avoid the use of any pronouns for the first several months of speech. Over the course of the toddler years, children gradually develop the capacity to use pronouns appropriately in everyday speech.

If you're wondering when your baby will use pronouns, here are some points to consider.

1. Your baby probably won't use pronouns at all until nearly his second birthday. Babies begin using pronouns at an average age of 24 months. At this stage, you may hear him using "mine" or "me" with some frequency, although he may "switch" pronouns and use them incorrectly. A toddler this age may also confuse gendered pronouns like "him" and "her," or avoid using them at all. Look for the first signs of pronoun use at or around your baby's second birthday, but don't expect them to be precise or correct yet.

2. Children usually use pronouns appropriately by age three. About one year after the earliest uses of pronouns, or 36 months of age, you can expect your child to use pronouns with more precision and accuracy. A three-year-old will often be able to say sentences such as, "I want you to get me the ball," or "That's my toy, not his." Some confusion is still fairly common at this age. Many a three-year-old will say, "Me go with you!" or "She my friend," while still demonstrating completely normal development.

3. The earliest pronoun use should come no later than two and a half. If your child isn't using pronouns at all-even inappropriately-by 30 months of age, it may be a sign that he has a delay in speech or language development. Mention the problem to his pediatrician if you haven't heard any signs of pronoun use by two-and-a-half years of age. She may refer your child to a speech-language pathologist to test for difficulties in language development.

4. Your child should use most pronouns appropriately by three and half. While occasional slip-ups are common, it shouldn't take your child more than three and a half years to use pronouns appropriately most of the time. While you can't expect exact grammatical precision at this age, you should seek help if your child still switches "me" and "you" or "him" and "her" at 42 months. Persistent, severe pronoun confusion at this age is not part of a normal developmental pattern.

5. Get professional help any time you're concerned. When my daughter reversed pronouns consistently at 30 months-always calling herself "you" and everyone else "me"-I trusted my instinct and sought professional help, even though she wasn't demonstrating clinical "red flags" for speech delay. I was glad that I did, because early speech therapy addressed what turned out to be a possible symptom of high-function autism. If you are concerned about your baby's use of pronouns at any stage, get in touch with an expert to rule out a serious problem. Early intervention can reduce long-term detrimental effects.