Planning your Preschooler's First Sleepover

The first time my daughter's friend invited her to spend the night, I felt surprised. It was hard to believe that my little baby -- the same child I'd rocked, nursed and burped just a few short years ago -- was now old enough to sleep at a friend's house. Of course, at three and a half, some people would say that she is still too young for an overnight adventure away from home. I did end up finding that my preschooler's first sleepover ended up being a hit for all the kids involved -- two 5-year-olds, a 4-year-old, and my daughter.

Here are the tips I used to make my daughter's first sleepover fun, safe, and memorable for everyone involved.

1. Invite the grown-ups! This was the simplest solution to a stress-free sleepover for my preschool-age daughter. All of the parents of the invitees, who happened to be friends, had their own slumber-party alongside the kids. The grown-ups get to eat pizza and socialize with friends, while staying close-by should conflicts, nightmares or homesickness become a problem for the kids. I recommend going with your child to a sleepover if at all possible.

2. Know the host family well. I would never, under any circumstances, let my daughter stay overnight with a family that I don't know very well -- at least, not until she's quite a bit older. Preschoolers don't have the impulse control to follow rules when mom and dad aren't around, and often don't have the verbal capacity to inform parents of any misbehavior on part of the host family. I wouldn't recommend allowing your preschooler to attend a sleepover unless you are close friends with the host family.

3. Time it right. A school night or church night is never a good time to have a sleepover. Preschoolers tend to break, bend and stretch all the typical rules that govern their night-time behavior. They're likely to be irritable and out-of-sync for days after the sleepover, even moreso than older children. For this reason, I would recommend doing a sleepover only on a Friday night or a school break if your child is in preschool.

4. Keep the kids entertained. Activity is the best defense against boredom -- meaning it's also the best defense against misbehavior in preschoolers. Plan plenty of activities, from art projects and movies to board games and outdoor play. These activities will help to keep the kids happy and entertained and, when it's time for the kids to go to bed, they'll be worn out enough to crash quickly and peacefully.

5. Bring treasured objects from home.

Preschoolers tend to develop strong sentimental attachments to inanimate objects. These objects, known as "loveys," may include photographs, stuffed animals, blankets, pillows or dolls. If your child has a lovey or any other object she treasures, bring it along for her first sleepover -- and, if you're the host, encourage other parents to also bring them.