5 Reasons to Tickle Your Kids

I clearly remember the first time my daughter laughed. She was looking at me with that glassy, amazed stare that newborns have, as if amazed by my every movement. On impulse -- I suppose looking for some way to surprise her -- I tickled her under her arms. Much to my delight, she started giggling immediately -- and didn't stop laughing for almost half an hour. This, of course, made me laugh, too, and I cataloged the memory as one of my favorite moments of motherhood. Now, I still wake my 3-year-old daughter up most mornings by tickling her feet and belly.

I almost pity parents who don't tickle their kids. To me, it's one of the highlights of parenting. Here are a few good reasons to tickle your children.

1. It's the whole reason kids are ticklish. Evolutionary psychologists have determined that we're tickling for one reason -- to bond with our parents. According to "The Mystery of Ticklish Laughter" by Christine Harris, published in the magazine American Scientist, humans evolved to be ticklish so that children will learn to associate a parent's touch with a pleasurable response (laughter). It makes children more trusting of parents and less likely to recoil if a parent has to use harsh force -- like jerking or pushing -- to get the child out of danger's way. This explains why kids usually get less ticklish as they grow older.

2. It strengthens bond and trust. Christine Harris observed that parents in almost all cultures tickle their children, often beginning in infancy and extending into early- to mid- adolescence. As social creatures, we depend upon physical contact to effectively communicate with one another. Like nursing, holding and cuddling, tickling can provide an opportunity for parents to maintain physical contact with their young children. This fosters a strong parental bond that will last far beyond infancy and toddlerhood.

3. It relieves stress.

I was once reading in a parenting forum, where several moms were admitting that they sometimes feel an urge to hit their children. All the parents in the discussion agreed that it was wrong, but couldn't find a productive way to handle those bursts of anger that make use clench our teeth and ball our fists. One mom offered up the suggestion that angry parents resort to tickling instead of hitting -- and, whaddayknow, it works! I've taken to tickling my daughter to dispel conflicts when either of us are angry. It quickly makes a tense moment turn into giggles for both of us.

4. It helps development. The development of laughter is actually an important milestone in a toddler's development. Laughter is one of the basic, early forms of emotional communication, along with crying and babbling. By tickling your baby, you help to encourage the development of this response, which can help him learn voluntary laughter and other emerging communication skills. Later in infancy, this will give way to intentional communication, speech, and bonding between your child and other people.

5. It's fun! There's only a finite window of time in which your kids will be both ticklish and eager to accept tickles. Believe me -- when your kids are 14,, they'll have long outgrown being tickled. And odds are high that they won't want any hugs, kisses or cuddles either. Tickling is one of those opportunities that you only get to have during a few brief moments of your little one's ever-fleeting childhood. Go ahead and make the most of it while you still can, and enjoy these precious moments of parenthood.