My three year old daughter has a habit of climbing into my bed at about 4:00 every morning. I will be completely asleep, blissfully dreaming about chocolate and/or Orlando Bloom, when I'll suddenly awaken to a pair of bright eyes and chubby cheeks in my face. Her excuses for overtaking my bedroom change with the wind-- ranging from "I had a bad dream" to "I need four cuddles" to "I'm a baby parasaurolophus and I need to sleep with my mom in case there are pachycephalosauruses trying to eat me."
As much as we parents tend to frown upon preschoolers sleeping in their parents' beds, this is a developmental stage that I'm really not in that much of a hurry to rush past. Here are a few reasons that I don't mind my preschooler sleeps in my bed in the early mornings.
She's still just a kid.
I know that there are many moms out there who would be eager to point out that a three-year-old is not a baby-- and is, arguably, too old to sleep in her parents' bed every night. However, I know that my daughter's childhood is going to pass by faster than I can possibly imagine. I'm in no rush for her to grow up-- and, if slightly babyish behaviors like co-sleeping last a little longer than I'd planned, I can accept that. I'm willing to trade a foot of bed-space for happy memories and mutual comfort.
I can put my foot down when I need to.
There are times that I don't mind my daughter sleeping in my bed, but there are also times that I do mind-- and I can say so. As long as my preschooler understands that she can't always sleep in my room, I can deal with the fact that she sometimes wants (or needs) to do so. If I don't want my daughter in my bed, for whatever reason, I have no problem with leaving her alone in her room against her will. From what I've seen, the only parents who resent their preschoolers' sleep-sharing habits are those who refuse to say "no" when they don't want their kids in their beds.
3. Preschool sleep-sharing can be a need. We parents often trivialize our children's emotional needs, particularly when they are inconvenient to us. But I believe that many of the annoying habits we see in our kids are manifestations of genuine emotional needs. Preschoolers may start asking to sleep with their parents during a challenging time-- such as a divorce, a new baby, or starting school. During these times, a parent's close physical presence can provide relief and comfort. I see no reason to deprive a child of comfort because of principle alone.
I love my cuddle-bug!
When my daughter is thirteen, she won't want to cuddle with me. In fact, she probably won't even want to be in the same room as me. My "baby" may be a preschooler now, but I'm going to enjoy the closeness of her early-childhood for as long as I can. I enjoy snuggling with my precious little girl, and I know that her cuddly days will soon be in the past. Why not enjoy these fleeting years of closeness and affection while they last?
I am a fan of sleep.
At 4:08 in the morning-- when I'm half asleep and my daughter wants nothing more than an arm around her-- I see no reason to bother with kicking her out of my bed. There are times when my space is more important to me than my sleep, but, 9 times out of 10, I'd prefer to roll over and go back to sleep than go to the trouble of putting my daughter back in her room. For now, I'm perfectly content sharing my bed with my preschooler for a few hours of each morning.
No comments:
Post a Comment