This morning, my three-year-old daughter burst into uncontrollable laughter, to the point that she was beginning to lose color in her face. I kept asking her what was funny, but she couldn't answer because she was laughing so hard. Finally, she managed to restrain her laughter long enough to answer, "I was thinking about how funny it would be if boobs pooped!" Twenty minutes later, she started laughing again and squealed out, "Hey Mama! It would be so funny if people went pee-pee through their noses and had boogers in their butts!" I found the idea far more horrifying than amusing, but, of course, to my daughter, this was comedy at its finest.
This sort of humor-- "bathroom humor," which highlights body parts and bodily functions as inherently funny-- is very common among preschool-age children. If your preschooler has developed a strong interest in potty humor, here are some pointers for dealing with it.
1. Understand that it's developmentally normal.
I'm not too worried about my daughter's fixation on potty humor, because I recognize that it is ultimately normal. People, including children, tend to be most amused by the things that make them most uncomfortable. By three to four years of age, children begin to recognize that some bodily functions and body parts are private, and that conversations involving them seem tense or uncomfortable. Your child's potty humor is a way to push the limits to explore why certain topics are taboo or inappropriate.
2. Peer influence can have a tremendous role.
If your child's friends and siblings are constantly making poop jokes, it can be a major influence on your preschooler's sense of humor. This is especially true if the influential children are older. Your preschooler looks up to his friends and peers, and if he hears them presenting poop as the zenith of humor, he'll follow suit. If you have older children, gently ask them to tone down the potty humor. The absence of peer influence will affect your preschooler more than scolding.
3. Don't react too much. The best reaction to potty humor is simply to ignore it. If you act too strongly, by yelling at your child or telling him that he has said something gross or disgusting, it may simply encourage him. The taboo nature of bathroom humor is exactly what makes it so alluring to preschoolers, so a strong reaction may encourage it. If you double over laughing at your four-year-old's farts, you'll also encourage this inappropriate humor. My most common reaction to my daughter's humor is to simply roll my eyes and ignore it.
4. Have a talk if it's getting excessive. Very excessive potty humor might necessitate a sit-down discussion with your preschooler. Constant potty jokes can be a sign that your preschooler's fixation is based in an intense discomfort with his body, or in an obsessive interest in bodily functions. Ask your child questions like, "Why are butts so funny? They're just a body part, like an arm or a finger. And boogers aren't very funny. All they do is keep dust from going into your lungs so you can breathe." You can also ask your child's feelings: "Do you feel embarrassed when you poot? Is that why you always laugh at it?"
5. Offer alternatives. Explain how to maturely handle uncomfortable situations without resorting to potty humor. You might, for example, say, "You know, everybody poots. When I poot, I just say 'Excuse me.'" Also provide other, cleaner types of humor so your preschooler can get a good giggle without lewdness. Make jokes that contain puns, absurdity, or unpredictability as humorous points. These will encourage your child to outgrow his potty-humor stage in favor of a more mature, balanced, and socially appropriate form of amusement.
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